Grateful

Today I am grateful for

-Both boys having early bedtimes, so that even when they have a hard time going down, there's still time for me to relax.

-New motivation to be a home-maker. (It still confuses me too. But we're all liking it.)

-John working from home, at least for a while.

-New friends who already feel like old friends.

-The strength to step out of my comfort zone. And to let others into it.

-Not being pregnant again. (Yea. That was scary. Maybe I'll post about it tomorrow. Maybe.)

-The knowledge that John and I are where we're supposed to be in every way. Married to each other, two kids, self-employed, in this town, in this ward, in this particular house, even arriving when we did. We completely felt led here and already know some of the reasons why. (I have to admit that it's a comforting feeling. It took us several years to see just a little of why we were in Boston. Here, it only took a few days. The Lord really does know what he's doing.)

Ta Da! (It's just that easy!)

He's finally made an appearance! This is my big, chubby, ridiculously long baby!

First, the stats. Edward Owen weighs in at 9lbs 3oz and is 22 3/4 inches long. (Even the pediatrician didn't believe his length at first.) He was born 12/19/07 at 5:39 pm. The boy has lots of dark hair and is surprisingly strong, reaching for me just minutes after birth and holding his head up for long periods by day 2. Also, he's a great eater.

OK. So here's the story of how. Don't read on if these things bother you.

We were late for our appointment at the hospital, but were settled into our room by about 9:30 and started the IV to get things moving. After several hours, thing were progressing VERY slowly. But the contractions were becoming an issue for me, so the dr ok'd the epidural. (We'd spent quite a lot of time talking about my labor and recovery last time so that my pain, shock, and emotional state could be handled better this go round.) The anesthesiologist did a great job. He did hit nerves, but we'd talked about using some trial and error to get better placement, so I was expecting it. And his placement was sooo good. I did need a few extra doses over the course of the day, but only b/c of contraction pain in my back.

So, I'm numb and happy. John and I decided to watch a movie b/c clearly, this would be a long process. About halfway through, my back was starting to be problem again, so the nurse came in to check me before calling for an extra dose in my epidural. John got ready to call the grandparents to give a long overdue update, but the nurse stopped him with "Are you ready to have a baby?" She had me push through one contraction and then paged the dr b/c he was crowning! Unfortunately, my dr had expected me to take several more hours and had just gone into the OR to assist. So I met another wonderful OB as she ran in, suited up, and delivered the baby. It took less than 10 minutes! And because of my great epidural, I didn't feel any pain. Definitely the best way to have a baby.

Recovery has been much easier. Except for the exhaustion and a sore back, I don't really have much to complain about. I give a HUGE shout out to the maternity services at Newton-Wellesley Hospital for their focus on the patient's wants and needs. It was the best hospital experience I've ever been a part of.

So that's it! Still don't know if I'll ever be willing to do it again, but at least it won't be fears about labor and recovery making the decision next time.

1 day away is weird (and me being stupid)

It's been so great to have Edward's delivery scheduled. We've been able to plan everything from babysitting for Ethan to the last big shopping trip. But today, it's weird. It would be a little less so if I was having a C-section, but knowing that tomorrow morning I'll go into labor is just strange. And instead of being surprised by this new little life who decided to join us, we're saying "Hey. It's time. Get out here and say hi." I'm still glad that we've been able to prepare so well (and that health-wise we're doing the best thing for both of us), but I'm missing the surprise. Just a little.
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And why I was stupid today. If you are fixing a dryer, be sure to unplug it before messing with the wiring. Especially if you're 9 months pregnant! I nearly electrocuted myself replacing a faulty switch, which turned out to not be the only problem. I think I'll leave the other work for my dad or his wife when they're out on Thurs.

Belly Shots

This was about a month ago. Not much different except that it's smaller than now and only has the few stretch marks (compare it to the last photo to see the difference.)

Again, about a month ago. This is close to the angle that I see. It makes the belly look even bigger!

This is a maternity shirt. Nothing fits anymore and I have to wear one of the few longer shirts under everything.

Edward kicks less than his brother did, but he really likes to stretch. If you look closely (maybe click to enlarge), you can see the two different spots of shine with what is actually a large divot between. My belly is too swollen for him to distort it like this now, but for a while he would contort it into really bizarre shapes.

And the belly just the other day. The size difference is hard to see in this photo, but believe me, it just hasn't stopped growing. The spectacular part of this shot is the view of my stretch marks. Not a single patch of normal skin on the front of my belly. It's so beyond shot that I've lost all feeling in it! (But unfortunately the nerves in my tender uterus are more than making up for it.)

NOT TWINS!

I do really keep getting this question from random strangers (and teasing friends.) Yesterday at the dr's office it really came to a head. A pregnant woman and her mother came into the waiting room and the woman immediately headed for the bathroom (like we all do.) Her mother looked at me and said "Oh! How many are you having?" Apparently her daughter was about 6 1/2 months along with twins. (She looked about as big as I did at that point.) The mom was stunned when I told her I was only having the one. I had to give the whole shpeal about having large babies and carrying fully externally before she would believe me. And then she made a point of not telling her daughter so that she wouldn't worry about growing bigger than I am. I nearly burst out laughing b/c my mom has a nearly identical story from her last pregnancy!

So no! No twins! Just the ginormous one. (Actually, he's so big that the dr mentioned concern about my distended uterus yesterday. We're glad all around that my body won't have to do this much longer.)

Sorry to get your hopes up...

...and mine! It really was just the storm making my body go into labor. But it was too short and didn't push me over the edge. After hours of painful contractions that fluctuated between 6 and 15 minutes, I decided to try to sleep. So I had John rub my legs to ease the tension before laying down and that was the end of it. My body relaxed and not a single contraction woke me up (although that doesn't mean they stopped right away, just that they weren't strong enough to get me up from my coma.)

Now, nothing. He hasn't even dropped lower! We'll just have to wait and see if the storm on Sat night is long enough to make this happen. It really is miserable to feel your body starting on it's way, and then... give up.

The Belly

As promised, here's a photo. We just took it b/c we may need to head to the hospital tonight. I've been having contractions all afternoon, but they are more regular now. We'll keep you posted!

The last few days

After finishing up with the Christmas party last weekend and delivering the Sub-for-Santa donations on monday, Ethan and I have had nothing to do. It's been a little weird after weeks of going non-stop. But we're LOVING it.

Ethan and I have been spending our time just hanging out with each other. I can't imagine a better way to spend our last week together. He's been so much fun. Playing with all his toys, coloring, pretending to be everything from superheroes to pirates, and lots of dancing. We really need to spend the occasional day doing nothing more often. He's just a different kid!

Also, my body is in better shape. The leg problems that were keeping me up half the night are only a minor annoyance now. It's been good to get a little rest before all the work of a newborn.

The big craziness going on right now is the snow that's coming. This afternoon is the first storm, promising at least half a foot in a matter of hours. (And of course I have a dr's appt just as it starts so I can't stay out of it.) Then, on Saturday night, there's a nor-easter coming with predictions anywhere from sheeting ice to more than a foot of snow. Just in time to cause problems with Grandma J flying in.

Our only hope is that the changes in barometric pressure don't push me into labor. (It's crazy how many babies are born early for this reason.) We feel like the scheduled date is just perfect for us, and we REALLY don't want to be driving to the hospital during the middle of a storm.

So that's us for now. I'll try to get a belly shot posted later today (if I can find the memory card.)

12 long days to go

It's been a few days since I've written b/c the only news is that I'm more uncomfortable. On Wed, even the dr was hoping my body would be at the point where he could just admit me. Not even close. I've been having a lot of painful contractions, but irregular and only in front (thank goodness! I couldn't handle these if they spread to my back.) So just false labor. Yuck.

But it does mean that I'm trying to get ready, just in case. Nearly everything is at least here, if not washed and ready to go. So I need to pack my bag for the hospital and do at least a few loads of laundry. Then we're prepared whether this happens this weekend or in 12 days.

Actually, I'm going to try to hurry it along a little. Today, I'm going to do all that prep work, and then go to work for my last shift before going on leave. Tomorrow is the Christmas party, so I'll be running around all day and late into the evening. And I intend to push it!

Wish me luck!

Baby Talk

After dinner last night, the moms were talking around the table while the dads kept an eye on the kids. One of the dads walked into the kitchen and immediately backtracked with the comment that women always end up talking about pregnancy and labor.

This morning, Eric Snider's column had this Q&A.
Dear Eric: Why is it that every time a group of women gather, the conversation turns to swapping baby stories? -- Muddled in Montana
Dear Muddy: Think about it. If you shoved a nine-pound human out of one of your personal orifices, don't you think you'd talk about it a lot too?

That's exactly why we talk about it. It's still amazes us that we did it. (And for some reason chose to do it again!)

3 Weeks To Go

I'm going to adjust the date on the little baby to the right so that it counts down to my induction day. Just click on the numbers until you see a countdown. Only 21 days to go!!

December 19th, 2007!!

That, we hope, will be baby Edward's birthday. Because of Grandma J's schedule changes and the desire both on my part and the doctor's to do this early, we scheduled the induction. We are skipping the ultrasound to estimate size b/c if it turns out he's not quite as big as we think, then I would be bumped to a lower priority and could potentially have to wait until as late as Christmas day! No one wants that. So we are calling it a "previous history of large babies" and getting me on the schedule now with a high priority for delivery that day.

So... barring either an early natural delivery (doubtful b/c of his position), or my body's refusal to get ready even with the things they can do to push it along, we'll be having a baby Dec 19th!

33 Weeks

I'm not actually 33 weeks along until tomorrow, but close enough. I had a dr's appt today. I'd been worried a little b/c I'm not feeling quite as uncomfortable and miserable as last time. Partially b/c I just don't have the time to think about it, and partially b/c I don't feel as big. (I know that it's weird to worry about feeling good, but when you've spent months anticipating these last few weeks of misery, it just feels wrong.)

I learned today why I don't feel as big. Edward has settled in transverse (meaning he's laying sideways instead of the normal up and down). This explains A LOT. Including why it still feels like he has so much room to move around. He doesn't, but because he can roll, I get hands and feet sticking out everywhere. (When Ethan settled into position at 5 or 6 months, he was so stuck there that I developed bruises in the spot where he kicked.)

This also means he hasn't dropped at all. So I look lower and less pointy b/c of his position, but it's not b/c he's getting ready to come out. In reality, if he doesn't rotate on his own, it may mean a C-section for me (Yay!!) But we still have time, so with my luck, he'll rotate.

The one good sign for me delivering early is that I'm measuring a week big. And it seems that with Edward's shift sideways, the vertical measurement they take would be falsely reduced, meaning I might measure even bigger if he were upright. Even with Ethan's size, I always measured right on, so just more evidence that Edward will be a big boy.

Hopefully I'll have more news about when he'll be coming soon. I go back in 2 weeks and expect to schedule the ultrasound for between that appt and the one the first week of Dec. Then we'll be able to schedule a delivery!! Yay!!

Weirdest Symptom

Did you know that your eyes can swell when you're pregnant? I'm lucky that my hands and feet don't swell much. (Just enough to keep my from wearing my rings.) But apparently, my eyes have taken on some of the extra fluid. Any time I wear my contacts, they are so tight I burst blood vessels. So I'm resigned to wearing glasses until sometime in December. At least they're cute pink ones!

...can't...sleep...

It's 1:30am Monday morning and I can't sleep. There are a million reasons that I should be totally zonked.

1 - I just worked a grueling three days that pushed me so far past my limits I started having contractions. My body can barely handle my regular days at the moment. Work days are much longer and require me to be on my feet more. It doesn't help that before work on Friday I insisted on making a HUGE grocery store trip with Ethan. I need to do those when I have someone else to unload the car for me. (For anyone who is unaware, I work the evening shift. So after most of my regular day with Ethan, I hand him off to his dad and spend another eight hours on my feet at the hospital. On the weekends I do get to sleep in a little more, but my pregnant body doesn't recover very quickly.)

2 - I'm into the not-so-fun part of the pregnancy where I'm swollen, sick, and tired all the time. Already. I'm exhausted. I can't even pretend that I don't want this baby out NOW!

3 - I take a sleeping pill! The anti-nausea meds I still need are also a sleep-aid, but somehow have never seemed to help me sleep. Even my dr is confused by this one.

So really, I should be sleeping. The nausea and muscle spasms from pushing my body too far keep me from my rest. I have no idea how I'm going to function tomorrow, but Ethan won't disappear, so somehow I'll have to.

Belly Dancing

Yes, it's my belly that's doing the dancing. I'm sitting here watching Edward doing a little tap dance. It's the craziest thing. My belly is bouncing all over the place. Unfortunately the video camera is out of charge, so we can't capture it on tape. (Stewart, you got lucky this time.)

Looking at that picture....

I have a hard time looking at that picture of my belly. In some ways, it doesn't look that big. But I've got nearly 4 months to go (and to grow). For comparison, my belly is exactly the same size as a good friend who is due in less than 8 weeks. And she is smaller and skinnier than I. Also, Edward is nearly always standing upright, so because most of his hugeness is still just in height, he doesn't push out as much as up and down. More uncomfortable for me than noticeable to anyone else.

The other big reason I can't look at it is that I see the destruction of my body. I miss my body. I know, I know, some of it will recover. The extra weight in places like my arms and face will burn off. But some of me won't make it back so easily. Besides the obvious over-stretching of my belly (and other areas), I see the bad curvature of my back being pulled in a worse direction. Which reminds me of the damage being pregnant is doing to my hips, pelvis, and all the connected muscles. According to my last physical therapist, a lot of this damage is irreversible. His actual recommendation was to not be pregnant ever again. Obviously, I'm just really hoping he was wrong. If he wasn't, a third pregnancy could mean spending a few months unable to walk. I'm really, really hoping he was wrong.

Maybe I shouldn't blog when I'm tired and in pain.

My E Boys: Edward...

I made the mistake a few weeks ago of telling John how much easier this pregnancy has been. The meds are WONDERFUL and mean I don't struggle to keep my blood sugar up this time. And having Ethan means that I just forget I'm pregnant most of the time.

Or at least that was the case. Meds are still good, but I'm having to be more careful about veggies and anything else that causes gas bubbles. Talk about painful. The bubbles not only hurt, but they cause contractions, which Edward then pushes back against. It's like labor pains! I guess I just don't have much room in there any more.

That's the other crazy thing. I'm 21 weeks, when they say you should be starting to feel your baby moving. HA! Not only did I start feeling him at 13 weeks, I'm already at the point where I can grab onto his foot when he shoves! He really is that big and that strong. No little flutterings for me.

I'm also becoming large enough for this belly to get in my way. I can't lift much at all. Getting up and down is a problem. Ethan is complaining that he doesn't fit on my lap and I can't get down on the floor to play as easily. My poor stretch marks are itching like crazy. And I still have 4 months to go!! (I need to post a picture so that people will believe me.)

At least I know Edward is growing! He's already making himself a big part of our family.

Scrawny Boy

Ok. I am really getting sick of this.

We visited the dr today for what I had hoped was Ethan's last weight check. Although he is getting taller right on schedule, the boy has only managed to gain about an ounce a month, instead of the six he should be gaining. To give you some perspective on that, he gained about a third of a pound since his last weigh in, but should have gained three pounds. Arrgh! Back on the high calorie, high fat, high protein diet. They even want us to mix half whole milk and half cream in his cups for a few weeks.

Because I've been so annoyed that we've had to keep doing all this, I asked why this is such a problem. Especially because the dr agrees with me that he is just adjusting to be the tall, scrawny kid we expect him to be. I got a great explanation this time. At first, the problem was his drop in both height and weight on the growth charts. Then, his height leveled off at well above 50th percentile, but his weight kept dropping. Now that he's hovering barely above 25th in weight, they start worrying about his body getting (or not properly using) everything it needs. Particularly the fats he needs for neural development. (That would be for brain and nerve function for my husband who complains that I use big medical words.)

At this point, he is clearly still developing normally. He is ridiculously smart, so no problems there yet, and his physical development is right where it should be. But because we're back on the diet, we are also back to the monthly check-ups. (They want to make sure he gains, but doesn't get the chance to put on any unhealthy weight.)

At least this time I can join him in some of his yummy indulgences. Although there is clearly more of me (in more places than just my belly), my weight isn't going up either. Edward is following in his brother's footsteps at this point. Growing so fast, I can't manage to keep up with the both of us! Hopefully when he slows down in a few years, it's not as much as his older brother.

Halfway!

I'm officially halfway to the finish line. It's nice, but it also reminds me I have about 20 more weeks to go. Yuck. My belly already sticks out far enough that I bump into things when I'm not being careful. (The lab benches at work are at just the wrong height and I always come home with bruises.) Not really looking forward to being huge.