Day of Faith

Harvard recently had a "Day of Faith: Personal Quests for a Purpose" panel. They had five undergraduates talk about their religions, their beliefs, and how Harvard has affected their faith. Really interesting.

I was really blown away by the LDS junior who participated. She explained difficult topics clearly, she was well prepared for even the toughest questions, and she even clearly differentiated "We believe" from "I believe". She was a wonderful representative for the the church.

So if you're LDS, watch it to learn a little about how to present yourself. And if you're not, watch it to learn a little about us. It's worth the twenty minutes.


Day of Faith: Personal Quests for a Purpose - 3. Rachel Esplin from Harvard Hillel on Vimeo.

Yes, I am a Nerd

John got me the best present ever. Check it out! He couldn't decide which microbe to get me, so he went with a neuron. Because we could all use an extra brain cell or two. I love it.

I've been looking at all of them and I don't think I could decide either. I want so many! Clostridium perfringens, a Leukocyte, Yersinia pestis, Helicobacter pylori, ... I could go on and on. These are so awesome!

Some Random Things

- Edward got his first tooth on his first birthday. That could have been bad, but we didn't even know he was teething. Yay for my stoic, sweet guy!

- Ethan is having sleeping issues. Mainly going to sleep issues. It takes hours every night, and napping is non-existent. (It was only four days a week before, but he still needs it.) Our boy is exhausted. He's so tired that he's started having tantrums again. Like he's two. And the nearly constant whining and crying is driving me out of my mind. We have no idea what the problem is and have found nothing that will keep the boy in his room. Really no fun at all.

- Edward is a chatterbox. He almost never stops talking. I love that he looks at me and rattles off whole sentences, like I should understand exactly what he's saying. We've figured out a few. Mama, Dada, and Hi are all obvious. Then there are those that no one else would get. Ethan, All Done, What's That, Ball, and Raaar (as in roar). Also he has a specific grunt that means "Yes, my diaper is stinky." And he has the "no" head shake down pat. Loving that we can communicate more!

- John is shaving off his goatee in three days! Really, two days and a wake up. I'm so excited!! I've decided to call it a Christmas present to me. I've been ready for it to be gone for a while. He's had it for a year, people. A year of a scratchy faced husband is not my favorite. (I love him, just not his unkempt facial hair.)

- My Grandpa's doing great. We couldn't even let ourselves hope for this before, but he should be home for Christmas! Probably even the traditional Danish Christmas Eve at the farm. I wish I could be there. (Also, this means I really need to decide on a layout program and a printer so that I can buckle down and get his book ready for publishing. At least the first volume. Any suggestions? I've used Blurb, but have some issues with their layout program. Solvable ones, but it's easier to avoid them all together.)

- How is it that Christmas is so close and I haven't finished my wrapping???? Usually I'm done shopping before December hits and I'm done wrapping by the middle of the month. I like having the last few weeks to just relax and enjoy the season. Life managed to get in the way this year. At least I'm done shopping. (Unless you're family. We're aiming to have your gifts done by the end of January. Hopefully.)

- I need to clean the boys bathroom. But I think I'm going to go make some chocolate gingerbread cookie bars instead.

Testing All Toys

I'm sure that most of you have heard about the Consumer Product Safety Improvement Act (CPSIA) by this point. I've known about it for about a year, but was unaware that it would be incomplete.

Don't get me wrong. I'm all for this legislation. Safer toys? Fabulous. But, especially because of this. Yea. That would be the lead analyzer my dad's company is making. The company that we all hold stock in. We've been excited for the CPSIA ever since word first leaked out. And we all watched for the news when the bill passed in August. It was great news for us.

The problem I have with the legislation is the reason you may have heard of it. They made no provision for handmade toys. I am a firm believer that people should have the right to accept the risks of an "untested" handmade toy if they so choose. Without this provision, most makers and sellers of these toys will go out of business as the cost of testing is just too high.

So, if you are planning to write your congressman or something of the like, suggest that the CPSIA be amended to allow for handmade toys. Even if it means we as the consumer have to sign a release form to buy them. Don't bother asking to have it repealed. There were only 3 votes against it in the congress and senate combined. They LIKE this bill. But they may be convinced to fix some of its flaws.

Haven't heard of this bill? Here is a great overview of it. And here is a good analysis of how it may affect toy sellers (as far as anyone understands right now.)

NY Pictures and a Video

Fooled you! No pictures here.

I'm stretched a little thin for the next week or so and have no idea when I'll get around to posting my own. So I'm just going to point you to some from my dad's family blog.

Pictures of the boys are here, and a video of the Indian war whoop is here. Enjoy! (And thanks to Chris for posting them.)

Christmas Gifts

The last two weeks have changed my perspective on the Christmas season. I'd already been trying to focus on family instead of things, but apparently I had a ways to go. Since being home, I've had this obsessive need to rearrange and declutter my kitchen. I've been sorting through every cabinet, adding lots to the garage sale box. Because I need more room for good memories. Here's what changed me.

Spending time with Grandpa was so great. And we didn't need any stuff to enjoy our time together. It made me realize that the best gift he can give any of us is himself for as long as he can. After that, we'll be happy with his memories. Thanks for letting me help you get them into a form that will last for generations, grandpa.

Spending time with my parents and siblings and extended family made me miss them. And the east coast they live in. I was absolutely giddy about spending two weeks in the cold weather. I loved being able to watch my boys play with their grandparents, aunts, and uncles. Someone should move out here near us. Ben? Hannah Banana?? Dad???

Spending so much time with my kids (way more than I wanted because they slept with me) reinforced how much I love them and will do anything for them. I had several people comment on my mothering skills while traveling back home. In a good way. Each time I said thanks, but thought "I'm just doing what I need to. What are they talking about?" Looking back, I see that simply by not giving up when all of us were falling apart, I was showing them how much I loved them.

Spending so much time apart from my husband was horrible. We both decided we'd never do that again if we can help it. Grandma and Grandpa J, I don't know how you do it. I heard that song "All I Want for Christmas is You" on the radio while in NY and realized, besides the fact that I can't stand it, that all I wanted was to be home with John. I didn't need anything else. Just John.

So that's what's on my mind this December. I have my family and I don't need anything else.

Except maybe Rock Band for the Wii. And some black boots. I'm not perfect, people.

PS - I read this post today and it simply reinforced how important family can be. And reminded me of my favorite Christmas. Anyone else remember Ben sharing his pizza from Santa?

Too Fast!!

Slow down Edward! We love that you're so smart and that you're growing up, but we're not ready. This is what you've done, just in the last two weeks. (Sorry that you missed it all, daddy.)

-Standing
-Threatening to walk (We've been stopping him so that daddy doesn't miss it.)
-Indian War Whoop (I'll post video of this. It's hilarious.)
-Two teeth coming through at once
-Combing his hair (It's the cutest thing you've ever seen. I'll try to get video, or at least a picture.)
-Sharing, and not just the give and take back kind

I'm sure I'm forgetting some. It's all happening so fast, and I'm not ready to lose my baby. So Edward, cut it out!

Moments in a Hospital Room

Everyone should have the opportunity to spend so much unfettered time with each of their family members. I wasn't able to spend as much time as I would have liked because of my own boys, but the time I was able spend in the hospital with grandpa was wonderful. I wanted to record some of my favorite moments so that I don't forget them.

-The incongruity of grandpa in his hospital bed, wiggling his toes under the sheets, leading a meeting. He's a CTO and isn't willing to let anything slide while he can't be at work. He'd even participated in the 3 hour Board of Directors meeting that morning. That's grandpa. Always getting his work done.

-The opportunity I had to bring him two surprise books. One, the first volume of his memoirs. It was just a test printing. Unedited and without photos. But he loved it. The other book was from all of the family. He's been writing his book for us, so we thought we'd make one for him in return. It's a simple scrapbook with a page from each of us. I loved being able to watch him read through it. Tearing up at what each person wrote to him, and talking to their pictures. I wish every member of the family could have seen it.

-All of the people and life lessons we talked about. Grandpa has had a long, storied life. I'm looking forward to continuing to read his memoirs and learning even more from him.

-Going through the photos for his book. We were labeling them so that I'd know where to put them. But anyone who knows grandpa knows that this meant I spent hours getting to listen to grandpa's stories. I loved it.

-Tucking grandpa into bed. I'm grateful for the blessing it is to serve him. He's spent his whole life serving others and I love that he'll let us give back in these little ways.

No matter the outcome, I'm overflowing with gratitude for the opportunity to spend this time with him. I love you, grandpa.

Grateful

It's hard not to see how many things I have to be thankful for today. Now that I think about it, it could be hard. I've been without a husband for kid help and emotional support for more than a week (I'm dying here!) My grandpa spent Thanksgiving in the hospital while we had dinner at his house. I could complain about so many things today. But I just can't.

I'm grateful that I have a husband who is so wonderful with the kids, one who holds me up and allows me to do the things that make me happy. I'm grateful for happy, healthy, smart, fun, loving, and oh so adorable kids. I'm grateful that, after all these years, my parents are happy. I'm grateful for all that my dad's wife is doing to make sure grandpa is cared for. I'm grateful that, with the miracles of technology, grandpa was able to sit at the head of his table and preside over Thanksgiving dinner while still in his hospital bed.

And the smaller things. I'm grateful that I finally learned to make the yummiest rolls. I'm grateful that I know my mom's recipes off the top of my head and could bring a few family favorites to Thanksgiving. I'm grateful that my boys have slept through the night several days in a row so that I've been more rested. (And for their grandparents who happily get up with them in the morning.) I'm grateful for this computer that allows me to stay connected to my life, even when I'm away. I'm grateful for my cell phone that keeps me connected to my husband, no matter where we are.

I could go on and on. But these are the things that stood out to me today. I hope everyone had a happy thanksgiving.

For My Family

Every member of my family is both a science or tech nerd AND a music or drama geek. This video is for all of them. Enjoy!

I'm My Mother's Daughter

If you don't know my mom, then you're missing out. For many reasons. But one of them is extra nice for those around her. When my mom is having a hard time accepting something (loss of a loved one, for example) she bakes pies. Emphasis on the plural. We all know that you can tell how much mom loved someone by the number of pies she made when they died. There were times when we would have to invite everyone we knew to come eat because the entire kitchen table was covered with pies.

I think it's a great coping mechanism. I realized today that I bake when I'm stressed out. Why add something else to my list of things to do? Because you get yummy things afterward! It's nice to put in the effort and get a result you can enjoy. I'm not extreme as my mom, and I've branched out from pies, we still have a lot of yummy food. Right now, we have oatmeal cookies, apple crisp, funeral potatoes (you bake them...), and dough for sugar cookies chilling in the fridge. I may need to start giving some of this away.

The even bigger upside is my mood. Even with so much to do in the next three days, and completely different stresses involved with traveling and why I'll be in NY, I'm in a really good mood. I guess it's ok to be like your mom sometimes.

Off again

I'm not feeling very settled in to Texas yet. Partially because it's not on the east coast, so it feels nothing like home. And partially because I'm barely here!

I wanted to let everyone know that I may not post much, or at all, for the next several weeks. The boys and I are heading to NY to spend some time with family while my grandfather is in the hospital. We've been through this before. This is the third fight with this same leukemia. And we know the odds aren't fabulous this time.

Few of us are handling it as well as we have before. We've been waiting for it to come back, but were shocked by how quickly it came on. No warning. We were hoping for another year to spend more time with him and allow him to finish his memoirs. There's still a chance that we'll have him around, but no one is counting on it. Ever the scientist, he even decided to go with an experimental chemotherapy this go round so that any result will be beneficial to someone.

Anyway, I have five days to get us packed, finish Ethan's birthday plans, and plan two events for church that will either happen while I'm gone or right after I get back. At least keeping busy is helping me dwell less on the chance that we'll lose him to infection before I get there.

Man, this post is sad.

I think I'm going to be sick...

I went to the gym tonight. (Will someone please revive my parents? I'm sure they just fainted from shock.)

Anywho, the gym has a pool. And the membership is pretty cheap. AND they have free childcare. Can't wait to try that out next time.

I went to go swim some laps. It was pathetic. I was winded after the third lap or so. Total, I probably only swam for about 15 minutes. I can't believe how out of shape I am!! (Yes I can. I'm breathing hard after going up the stairs some days.)

On the way out, I had to keep telling myself not to throw up. My body really isn't used to exercise of any kind. Have you heard the term skinny-fat? It means you look skinny, but your muscles and heart are incredibly out of shape. That's me. Not that I'm skinny anymore. But I'm not overweight by any standard. I even got a few admiring looks as I walked by the weight machines. (Gotta remember to put my wedding ring back on next time.)

Ooo Ooo. The best part. I weighed myself. Really, that was the best part. Even fully clothed and with my sneakers on, I've lost more than 15 pounds since having Edward! Pre-pregnancy weight is only 6 pounds away. Maybe I can make it before he turns one. I'd deserve a party for that. With cake. And ice cream.

Man I want some ice cream.

Skipping Ahead - Grownup Halloween Party

I needed to skip ahead b/c I've already posted some pictures of this elsewhere and just wanted to bring on all the comments at once.

DON'T SCROLL DOWN TO THE PICTURE YET!

SERIOUSLY!!

YOU'LL RUIN THE SHOCK OF IT!!!

So, John's new company hosts a big Halloween party every year. It's always music themed. This year it was 80's Beat-Boxing. (Break-dancing.) Everyone was supposed to dress along those lines, or at least some kind of 80's pop music.

Ummm... yea. That's just not us. So we decided to branch out to other 80's music. After weeks of searching for the right costume ideas, I saw a comment somewhere about 80's goth-punk. That was it. The best costumes ever were born. You really need to click to see it larger.

So yes, we crashed their party. It was awesome. And honestly, we loved wearing these outfits. Both of us commented that our clothes the next day felt like our 'regular costumes'.

You know you want to borrow that wig.

Florida Part 1 - The Beach

We started off October with a trip to Florida. The first night was spent with our old friends Alissa and Matt, and their 4 kids. Man we miss those guys. The next day, we decided to head to the beach. Of course, I have no pictures of them, or even of Ethan. Edward was being so danged cute, I couldn't stay away. (Thanks Liss for the last two photos!)

The Sand Monster
Not long after this he was coated head to toe. He loves sand.

He wanted to play with the big kids.

Watching the waves

Can you see the sand coating the left side of his face and in his fat rolls? He loved it.

Lounging in the stroller after a good rinse off. What a great day.

Wait! There's More!

Edward stuck under his exersaucer. I had to hold back my sniggers while getting him out.





You wouldn't think it most days, but these boys really do love each other.







And finally the joy of messy eating. Followed by a bath in the backyard. Even with Ethan and John trying, they couldn't keep him in the tub.

And More Pictures for you Voyeurs

Edward stuck at the gate because he still hasn't figured out how to step back down. Ethan in his favorite 'waiting for dad' spot. Edward's punk hair. Ethan's ever present tongue. And my boy reading his first book.

Would You Like to See Some Pictures???

Apparently everyone has given up on me. No one reads my blog anymore. I know that you don't care about me, you just want to see pictures of the boys. I get it. If that's what it takes to appease you. Here are some pictures of Edward back in Sept. He was being so cute! And yes, he did climb up onto the back of the couch by himself. Little stinker.

Edward's Game

Edward, in the middle of his misery, is having a few minutes of fun. I heard him laughing over by the fridge and called him over. He crawled to me, giggling all the way, to show me his new game. He has two circular magnets that he pulled off of the fridge. He picks them up off the floor, and lets go while still waving his hand around so that they go flying. He thinks it's hilarious.

He's also hitting them so that they slide across the tile. Chasing things is one of his favorite games, and he's always happy to send things flying himself if no one is willing to do it for him.

Oh! Now he's moved on to a plastic cup. It rolls better when he hits it. I really should be videotaping this, but I love sitting here laughing with him.

This is why we call him Sweet Boy. In the midst of sickness, he reminds us why we love him.

Apology, but we're sick over here

October was a very busy month for us, and I have a ton to recap. It would have been done this past week, but our sweet boy came down with a high fever. At least he managed to hold it off until the day after our second big trip of the month. Unfortunately, we're on day 7 of this. Yesterday we even went in and did lots of blood work and chest x-rays. (Thank goodness our dr's clinic not only has sunday hours, but radiology and a lab too!) Even after all of that we're still thinking virus, so we just have to wait it out. His body is fighting hard, so hopefully we'll be over this soon. Then I promise lots of pictures and details of our fun, exhausting month.

Please keep Edward in your prayers. He's having a rough go of it.