Christmas Gifts

The last two weeks have changed my perspective on the Christmas season. I'd already been trying to focus on family instead of things, but apparently I had a ways to go. Since being home, I've had this obsessive need to rearrange and declutter my kitchen. I've been sorting through every cabinet, adding lots to the garage sale box. Because I need more room for good memories. Here's what changed me.

Spending time with Grandpa was so great. And we didn't need any stuff to enjoy our time together. It made me realize that the best gift he can give any of us is himself for as long as he can. After that, we'll be happy with his memories. Thanks for letting me help you get them into a form that will last for generations, grandpa.

Spending time with my parents and siblings and extended family made me miss them. And the east coast they live in. I was absolutely giddy about spending two weeks in the cold weather. I loved being able to watch my boys play with their grandparents, aunts, and uncles. Someone should move out here near us. Ben? Hannah Banana?? Dad???

Spending so much time with my kids (way more than I wanted because they slept with me) reinforced how much I love them and will do anything for them. I had several people comment on my mothering skills while traveling back home. In a good way. Each time I said thanks, but thought "I'm just doing what I need to. What are they talking about?" Looking back, I see that simply by not giving up when all of us were falling apart, I was showing them how much I loved them.

Spending so much time apart from my husband was horrible. We both decided we'd never do that again if we can help it. Grandma and Grandpa J, I don't know how you do it. I heard that song "All I Want for Christmas is You" on the radio while in NY and realized, besides the fact that I can't stand it, that all I wanted was to be home with John. I didn't need anything else. Just John.

So that's what's on my mind this December. I have my family and I don't need anything else.

Except maybe Rock Band for the Wii. And some black boots. I'm not perfect, people.

PS - I read this post today and it simply reinforced how important family can be. And reminded me of my favorite Christmas. Anyone else remember Ben sharing his pizza from Santa?